Is telling lies for genuine reasons allowed?
A question from a girl follower (Name hidden on request):
“i offer my respectful obeisances onto you..Can u plz tell me that is it right that for some reason we tell a lie just for improvement in devotion to Krishna? I told lie to my many friends bcz they are all depended on me.. they always asked the importance of their in my life.. they are always msgs me all the time for any reason, no doubt they are also devotees, but they are not talking about krishna most of the time.. nd bcz of all these most of my time was wasted.. that is why i told them that my sim card is now blocked.. i said this bcz i want to spend my most of the time in krishna conciousness.. . Am i doing right to telling a lie to my friends..?
Though it is a standard advice to avoid lies, in some cases, harmless lies can be allowed. But, you should have the maturity and intelligence to decide which is a harmless lie and which is harmful. Some times, harmful lies too may seem like harmless lies.
So, this must be dealt very carefully without adding karma.
Moreover, the relaxation can not be taken as an advantage.
In your case, you have told lie only to keep the unwanted persons away to practice devotional way of life still better. So, this is not at all a lie. It is a technique to keep the disturbing persons away. So, nothing to worry.
Let me give some examples:
HARMLESS AND KARMA-FREE LIES (THAT HELP OTHERS)
(1) If a lie can save another person from miseries, death, etc., you can lie. For example, if a person is trying for suicide in front of you for love failure, you may tell this lie to save him at that time: “Hey, I have spoken to that girl. She has agreed to reconsider her decision. So, wait for more time”
After thus stopping his suicide, immediately, you should take him to a counsellor and get him counselled well. Since this lie is to save him from death, it is harmless.
(2) If a lie can boost the morale of a person who looks ugly with more pimples, you can tell this lie: “Your pimples show your knowledge. It is said that only the knowledgeable people will have more pimples. So, these pimples are your certificates”
(3) I too have lied to my mother. My mother had a kind of excitement whenever any of our relatives had informed that they are visiting our house. My mother starts to be nervous even 2-3 days before their visit. She would torture me “Hey, are the kitchen goods sufficiently available? Clean the toilet with cleaner well. Wash the entire home well. Keep the unwanted things away.”, like that. I can not remain peaceful. I would ask her: “Who is coming? Only my brother and his family is coming. Why should we decorate our house for him? If you go to his house, it will also be like ours only. So, please leave the house as it is naturally. We should not be artificial. I will clean everything on a Sunday”
However, she is very perfectionist. So, to close her mouth, I and my brothers and sisters made a plan. We should stop informing their visit to my house in advance and we should inform her just on the day of their visit.
Thus, we started to hide the information of their visit thereafter. This worked out. My mother did not get tensed. My brothers and sisters come to my home suddenly. If they come at 7 AM, I would tell about this to my mother only at 6 am, ie, just one hour in advance.
Thus, such silly lies or hidings are harmless since it does not make the people tensed.
(4) If your father needs eye surgery for cataract and he refuses since it is very costly and he does not like to give you heavy expenditure, you can lie to him that the surgery costs just Rs.5000, not Rs.50,000 because the doctor is your school friend. This will make him to readily come for surgery. Such harmless lies can be allowed.
(5) If a child losses his/ her mother in her age of 2 or 3, you can lie that the mother has gone to meet the god and she may come back after some months. This will make her relieved. These are all innocent lies that do not addd karma.
(6) If a patient is to die in a few days and the doctor has personally informed you, this can be hidden from the patient because he may get upset. Let him be peaceful till he dies.
LIES THAT SHOULD BE AVOIDED (HARMFUL LIES)
Except the above kind of innocent lies that will do good for them, we must avoid all other lies.
(1) Changing the horoscope to get married earlier, if you had any dosha is a serious lie. Because, it invites an innocent person with no dosha to marry you. So, be geuine in the horoscope.
(2) Hiding the previous marriage and marrying again. This will cause serious damage in future.
(3) If you encourage a girl or boy to hide a fact to the groom or bride to see her/ him married earlier, you are not doing good for her. Instead you are spoiling her life. If the bride or groom has any disease or physical or mental inabilities, it should not be hidden from the groom or bride. If hidden, it may affect her whole life.
(4) In general, the marriage life should start on the platform of truth. Telling lies about the family status, diseases, education, earning, way of life, etc, will seriously affect the life later.
(5) Telling lies in the interviews will seriously affect the career life. I myself have terminated one of my staff within 2 days of joining. She was selected by me seeing her past experience certificate and I fixed higher salary seeing her past salary. However, when I came to know that she had got that experience certificate with boosted salary structure from her relative’s firm even without working there, I immediately terminated her.
So, no lie in the case of jobs.
(6) No lies in insurance policies. If you are a smoker and hide this fact while taking the insurance certificate, you may be denied the claims later if they found that you are / were a smoker.
(7) No lies in the marital relations. If you had committed any sinful or offensive act innocently before marriage and got reformed, you may hide them to the spouse. But, if you are still continuing that till today, don’t marry at all. Don’t spoil the life of a person.
(8) No lies to the parents. Because they believe you. Be frank to them. If they will scold you for a fact, tell that fact to them and get that scold. It is good instead of telling lies.
(9) No lies to the doctors or lawyers. Because it may lead to wrong treatment and wrong judgements.
(10) Do not lie to your spiritual master (Guru). Because, he trusts you and accepts you as his disciple. SO, ensure that you are following all the recommended rules before accepting a guru.
(11) Don’t go for silly lies. One of my known person was struggling for money in life. But, his neighbours were rich. So, he also showed himselflike a rich person. However, when he had to borrow from his neighbours when his wife fell down in the bath room, they came to know about his real financial standing. So, lies will anytime be exposed. Be truthful.
In general, if we tell a single lie, we have to keep them in our mind because we have to maintain the same lie everywhere. If we forget this at any place, we will be caught.
Therefore, it is always safe to be avoid lies except in a few harmless conditions like the ones mentioned in the beginning of this reply.
Your every harmful lie is added in your karma account and you will have to face their reactions later.
Hope you are clear.