I am always worried about what others will think of me. How to overcome it?
A woman follower asked like this:
“I have few issues. Please help me overcome it. 1) There are some people close to me who love me and also there are people who dislike me, why is it so? I always feel all people in this world should only love me. That is why I keep worrying, what will other people think. Please guide me to come out of this. “
ONLY UNPRODUCTIVE PERSONS WATCH & COMMENT OTHERS!
Everyone is thinking that the entire world is looking at him/ her only.
So, such psychological effects in you too.
Actually, everyone in this world has many businesses to do. They have their own families, jobs, problems, entertainments, etc., to care.
If anyone is watching you, he/ she must be a lazy person who has no other businesses to do.
You need not care such persons who spare time to watch others instead of themselves.
They must be unproductive persons.
A productive person will not judge others unnecessarily.
There are persons who care for others instead of judging them.
Think of them, associate with them and be happy.
Now, know this fact:
NO ONE CAN BE A GOOD PERSON FOR ALL!
This is the point.
A person can’t satisfy all the surroundings. Because, everyone has come from different background.
Accordingly, everyone will have different preferences and perceptions on every matter.
Have you seen any Prime Minister of India or any other country who has been appreciated by all the people?
Have you seen any product in the market that is liked by all the people? If yes, then, why there are this much of brands in this world?
Have you seen any leader who has been appreciated by all the people? Even Gandhiji had some commenters. And, he was killed by an Indian National only. Even Pandit Nehru ji, Sardar Patel, etc., too had opponents.
Have you seen any religion that has been accepted by the entire world? If yes, then, why there are hundreds of religions?
Have you heard about any God who has been accepted by the entire world? If yes, then, why there are so many gods? One is worshiping his favourite god and talks ill about other gods. Why?
If his neighbour buys a new car, one feels proud about his owned car as if better than that of his neighbour. Why?
People vote for a party in an election, but, throw the same party in the next election. Why?
Why the same vegetable or recipe is liked by many and disliked by others?
Why the same film is liked by many and disliked by many others?
When Mr.Modi implemented Demonetization of Rs.500 and 1000 notes, large number of people supported it though they faced some difficulties. But, now, some of them speak differently. Why?
Thus, there is no single person or concept or forum that has been accepted by all.
There will always be people to support as well as oppose the concepts or activities of a person.
How do you expect that all others should appreciate you?
It is going to be always impossible.
The world is the union of diversities.
We have to accept the fact that we can’t remain good for all.
We can just follow some ethics and lead a responsible life. That’s all. If anyone comments against you, you should see the trend as natural one.
Some of your approach may be liked by many and also disliked by others.
Though you do good for a person, some persons may develop a motive behind that help.
The elders may not support the activities of youth and vice versa.
The Americans can not be expected to accept the life style of Indians and vice versa.
SOLUTION: THINK FROM OTHERS’ PERSPECTIVE!
If anyone seems to be not good for you, that means, you have not thought in his perspective.
For example, we always comment against the beggars. But, there are many aged or physically and mentally challenged people come for begging because of getting neglected by their own family members.
We always view everything in our own perspective. We expect that others too should live like us.
This is the worst mistake we do in our day to day life that affects our mood of the day.
A wife complained to her relative about her husband.
She said that he does not visit the home properly and always spend long hours in his office.
That relative felt pity on her and asked the husband in loud voice why he behaves so.
“My wife does not cook and ask me to order in the hotel. She does not allow me to come near her for the past one year. She does not speak nice words. She does not arrange the child to school. She just eats, watches television and sleep. If she is ill, I can understand. She is perfectly alright in health. Why should I bear all her atrocities just because I tied three knots around her neck?”
Now, the relative asked her whether it is true. She was calm.
Then he told her: “If you behave like this, which person will live with you? Why do you accuse your husband as if you are perfect? First you correct yourself and then speak about him”
Thus, the relative first felt pity hearing the complaint of the wife. After hearing the situation of the husband, he realized how pitiful the husband is without getting anything from his wife.
Thus, every coin has two sides.
So, learn to face both the appreciations and accusations as the natural trends in this life. Both will always exist till the world exist.
No one can escape from it, but can just insulate himself from them. That’s all.
Hope you are now aware of the reality of life.