Can a girl marry a boy who has no job and education, (though they are devotees)?
Qn. In detail:
“ i love a boy who have no qualities like me bt he have a nice heart n i love him very much he is a devotee boy bt he have no education n job n money… bt although i love him very much i want to spend life with him bt my parents don’t like him.. for that i took decision that i won’t marry him.. for this i feel very sad bcz i love him very much.. i also communicate with him now like friend or a family member n he also behave like a best friend bcz he love me truly for that i always try to do good things for me what to do prabhuji plz help me plz plz”
Love is blind. This is the statement said for centuries.
Love and Real Life are different.
When the life pressures press you too much, love becomes silent.
This is the reality.
A person may have good qualities and good heart.
Will that good heart give grains to eat every day, house to live and garments to wear?
How is it possible?
Love may arise in the hearts of boys and girls for many reasons. But, when love comes, intelligence goes and emotions dominates the hearts of the persons involved.
When two persons love, they usually do not see the darker sides of our life. They always think positively in all matters.
Oh, God will give.
Won’t God arrange for his devotees?
God is merciful and he will not let me down.
This is what many lovers think.
The boy or girl projects only his/ her positive side to the lover.
This gives a false strength that they can face anything in life.
If you enter into the war field without the weapons, what will happen?
You will be killed.
If you enter into the exam hall without preparing the subjects, what will happen?
You will get zero score only.
If you enter into kitchen without knowing how to cook, what will happen?
No one can eat the food prepared by you.
Same applies in LOVE WITHOUT BEING AWARE OF THE REALITIES.
If two persons enter into the married life without proper preparations to face this life, they will run the life smoothly for a month or two.
After that, problem starts.
Financial pressures, image pressures from relatives and friends, children pressures, their education, escalating cost of house rent and hence need to buy own house, etc.
These factors will pressurize you from time to time.
When you are not prepared to face these pressures, your love can not come to help you.
Heated words may be exchanged between you and him.
Love can not help here also.
You will end up in frustration. It may go upto inferiority complex on his side and then even separation.
You start to think: “Oh, could I have avoided marriage without earnings?”
This is too late because everything has finished.
Love can help to bear the pressures to some extent. When pressures mount, love goes to sleep.
In my opinion, LOVE means an evaluating period just to understand each other’s nature and fitness for marriage.
Not to develop too much of emotions and bury your intelligence.
Therefore, my opinion is that a boy should not enter into marriage without having proper earnings. And, the girl too should not marry a boy who has no earnings.
Your family would have supported had that boy been in some employment.
Which parent will give their daughter to someone who has no job?
Are they fools?
The lovers may be fools because they have hidden their intelligence because of emotional love.
But, the parents are not fools. They have experience in life running.
They worry about the earning and family background of the boy before giving their girl to him.
Therefore, what you have done is right and there is no need for any guilt in that.
If both of you settle in a temple and involve in services for God and you are given shelter and food by the temple, you may consider marrying.
But, if both of you are going to live in the outer world after marriage, sorry, A JOB IS THE FIRST REQUIREMENT FOR THE BOY.
Therefore, be good friends decently hereafter.
Marry the boy arranged by your parents and lead a responsible life.
In case you like to give a last opportunity to that boy, tell him that he MUST arrange a job for him with the earnings that is sufficient for running a family comfortably, within six months.
If he starts earning within that period, marry him.
If not, follow what I said above. Leave the matter to your parents.
This is my solid advice for all boys and girls who choose life partners. Do not even develop love of the boy has no earnings if both of you have to live in the outside world.
All the best.