What to do if a boy misuses your photos taken with him?
Qn. In detail from a girl:
“please …. advise me…how can be Establish a bully defense zone…. I am too emotional… I always cry in alone ….. I am unable to make friends… in college life …. I don’t know why I worry too much…. my mind always thinking about the college life …..
I joined ————–(Spiritual organization name hidden) last year.. There i met a boy and we have relation of 6 months… and then he starts blackmailing me.. for some personal pics …. becoz of him I left that organization……. he blames me… I have no guts to face those people…in that temple…. please give me advise what to do…. I don’t want to away from Krishna… I want to continue….it…. please… advise me…prabhu jii….”
REPLY:
You went to that temple. Developed relation with a devotee. Then, you are blackmailed by that boy devotee.
This is the case.
If a boy misuses your photos taken with him, he is not a devotee, but a criminal.
My question is: Did you go to temple to worship God or love a boy? You have developed love within 6 months of going to that center. Are the temples the centers of match making?
This is happening everywhere. Some devotees introduce themselves speaking about God. They show their talents of having so many details about God. His/ her talents attract the one or two persons of opposite gender. Then, love starts.
(Abuses and Spiritual learning in Childhood affecting the studies! Tips! READ HERE!)
I have always advised the young devotees: DO NOT SEE THE APPEARANCE AND BODY OF THE DEVOTEES. JUST HEAR THEIR PREACHING AND COME BACK HOME. Unless the girls are careful, they are at risk at ALL PLACES.
If the devotees do not have mind control, the temples will become the centers of cultivating love or match making centers. Some girls and boys may be discussing personally in the temples. This will create an unhealthy atmosphere in the temples.
In India, many lovers use temples to develop their love. Because, they believe that they can get devotee spouse from temples only and selecting the boys/ girls from outside world is risky. Therefore, they use temples to collect suitable match for them. In India, you can see many lovers sitting together in the open spaces in temples and discuss. Some lovers even go for violations inside the temples.
In general, the people come to the temples getting frustrated with the contamination of outside world. But, they have to see such scenes in temples also.
This trend is painful. Temples are for worship and learning the way of life only. It should not be used for other things. If you violate this, you will be tested by the Lord as faced by you now.
Why should he take personal pictures with you? Did you take such pictures with him? If yes, why did you take such pictures with him even before marriage?
(USING SOCIAL MEDIA SAFELY WITHOUT LOSING PRIVACY! 25 TIPS! READ HERE!)
Even after marriage, taking such intimate photos should be avoided because the husband may turn to be an enemy at any point of time in this risky world and misuse those photos.
When we violate the social codes of conduct, we invite problems on our own. The temple managements are not responsible for that. And, just because that devotee is like that, it does not mean the organization/ temple is bad. When 100s of people assemble in a place, such violators will also be there in small numbers.
Therefore, do not hate that organization/ temple. Change yourself. First cut the association of that guy. He is not a good devotee. You too had violated the code by developing association with that guy. So, do remedy for that by cutting your association with him. No other way. He is not a trusted person.
You , as a girl, do not be emotional. Your dignity is very important. Never go for too much of affairs before marriage. If a girl feels that a boy will be ok for her, she must tell her parents and marry him. They should not discuss excessively and develop closeness and then regret later.
Human relations are very sensitive. Do anything with license. That means, LOVE A BOY AFTER MARRIAGE. THIS IS THE LICENSED AND SAFE LOVE WITH LEGAL PROTECTION.
(Also read THIS COMPLETE GUIDE ON HOW TO PROTECT THE GIRL CHILDREN FROM MEN.)
Stop going to that temple for about 6 months or one year , but, go to another nearby temple. Change your mobile number. Close your social media accounts known to him and open a new account with a God’s pic and safely be anonymous. If he comes to your home, tell him that you will report about him to police if the boy misuses your photos taken with him. When he speaks to your phone and threatens you, record his discussion in your phone and tell him that you will report to the police with this proof if he does not hand over the recordings that he is having. He must give the proofs to you. If he disturbs you still further, first report to the temple president. If problem continues, report to the police as a final step requesting them to maintain your identity secretly.
Be a wise devotee girl hereafter! Now-a-days, girls have to be wiser than ever, because the youth are becoming very intelligent.
I have been advising since 2011 to the girls NOT TO BE TOO MUCH OF EMOTIONAL. BECAUSE, ONLY SUCH EMOTIONAL GIRLS ARE CHEATED BY OTHERS.
Be intelligent and careful in your every approach hereafter.
(Also read this article to know how the women should safeguard their privacy without compromise.)